Inspiring stories of success, joy and refusing retirement from renegades rocking life after 50.

Featuring Seth Pepper

Episode 001 Unlimit Your Potential

This interview with Seth is packed with golden nuggets! We could have talked all day, and in fact will again soon I’m sure. Seth commented to me afterwards that he felt our entire conversation was Divinely inspired. I love that--and agree. So watch and listen, and consider how you can begin changing how YOU think today.

WATCH THE EPISODE BELOW:

SHOW NOTES:

Favorite Quotes

“Greatness can be a lonely road. Because you’re doing something that not a lot of people can relate to.” Seth Pepper

Favorite Moments from the Interview

We often see pressure as something negative. But here’s the truth, opportunity and pressure come together. In order to experience bliss, you need to get out of your comfort zone. When Seth and I started talking about this my chillometer went off!

Why the Renegade Boomer Community will love it

Is it possible experiencing discomfort is actually a portal to creating your own success?

Or how about the simple act of telling yourself “It’s no big deal” actually being a powerful truth to achieving at your highest level?

Imagine for a moment discovering how simple it can be to get into a flow state that manifests your unique destiny and bliss, no matter how impossible it once seemed.

All that and more is packed into my incredible conversation with world championship medalist and high-performance mental coach Seth Pepper on today’s Renegade Boomer podcast.

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View Transcript

[00:00:00] Tina: Hey everybody, it’s Tina Lorenz, the founder of the Renegade Boomer Anti-Retirement Movement, and I’m so excited today on the Renegade Boomer Podcast to have my guest of Seth Pepper.

I love your name, Seth. Seth and I have kind of a funny way of how we even met because we found out we both live in the same town of Tucson, Arizona, and we met through our hairdresser. We’re both there at the same time.

[00:00:24] Seth: Yes.

[00:00:24] Tina: You have such an amazing background. Seth is an elite performance coach, and he works with people at very high level as far as their performance in both professional sports, in business, in the arts, all of these things. I mean really, Seth, you have a list a mile long of awards and accolades, and all of that.

But you are the two-time national champion as a professional athlete, two times in the Hall of Fame, 25-time All-American. I mean, come on, over-delivery. And athlete of the year at the University of Arizona and just such a fascinating story.

But welcome, Seth. Welcome to the podcast today.

[00:00:58] Seth: Thank you. I’ve been looking forward to this for a long time. So thank you for having me.

[00:01:02] Tina: Oh, it’s gonna be fun. And if we could just take a minute. You have such a great story. I just love how you even got into, shall we say, the game of training your brain. So would you tell everybody how you even began that journey for yourself?

[00:01:15] Seth: Sure. Yeah. Well, I think it probably just came out of necessity because I started so late.

You know, I used to watch the Olympics when I was really young, and I fell in love with it, but I didn’t grow up in a family that was sports related. So I was kind of this, you know, freak, if you will, and when I was 14, that was when I, you know, you kind of start to think, okay, I gotta take control of my life.

And so I just like, “Okay, now, it’s now or never.” And I just started, you know, studying the Olympics cuz that was my ultimate dream, was to go to the Olympics and chose a sport that I had never done before out of process of elimination. I’m from a small town in Oregon and so I was looking for a sport that I could actually do.

And so I chose swimming. Once I started, you know, watching swimming, then the whole process is really, I call it a mental experiment, right? Because I had nothing to lose, everything to gain. And it was all this idea of how can I do this? You know, can I see something and then just go after it and make it a reality?

And so when I focused on swimming, there was a girl that just won the gold medal. And they asked the question that I was trying to figure out, which is what was gonna come next. And they said, if someone else is out there that wants to do what you just did, cuz she had just won a gold medal.

I was like, “Okay, well they’re speaking to me. This is it.” And so they asked what would she suggest? And she said, “Well, I went through YMCA.” So, I went down to the local Y. Tiny little place. And I walked in, and the head coach was there. I said, “I want to go to the Olympics. Can you help me?”

And he started laughing cuz you know that’s not your ordinary conversation. And then he said, “Okay, well do you know how to swim?” And I said, no. And he laughed a lot more. I said, no, of course. And he said, “Okay, well we’re gonna put you with the, you know, the eight-year-olds.”

And so I was with little tiny kids and they were beaten up on me in the pool. I mean, they were much better than I was. I was just trying to get across the pool.

But at the same time, my dad, he wasn’t an athlete, but he was always interested in self-development. So I grew up with books like Dale Carnegie books and all kinds of self-improvement books.

And so this was just a way of like experimenting with those ideas. And my dad had this book on it was on the brain and it was on memory. And they were talking about the subconscious minds, the power of it. I didn’t even know that you could train your mind at all.

But they had this study that’s really well known now. Back then, it was East Germany and they were basketball players, and they had three groups shooting baskets. One group, all they did was physical training for that day. And then the other group, all they did was mental and physical. They were a combination. And then the other group, they didn’t even touch a basketball, and they just worked on their minds.

And the results came back and the group that was the lowest was physical only, and then the mixed group was the highest. And then this group that didn’t even touch a basketball was just a little bit below the top group.

So immediately, I was thinking, “Okay, that’s the X-factor. That’s what’s gonna get me from A to B in the quickest route.” And that’s what I started focusing on, was treating my mind and my body at the same time as I was learning how to swim. So, it’s a foundation of this mental experiment and let’s see where this can go.

One part of the story was that I went to Sports Illustrated because the subconscious mind is visually-based, majority of it. And so I was looking for a picture that would inspire me. There was an Olympic edition of Sports Illustrated, and they had Pablo Morales in there. So I cut this picture out and it was almost like this picture was made for this moment cuz it’s a picture of him, like, celebrating. He’s got his fist in the air. And so I cut that picture out and then I put my picture, I took my picture.

Now, you see it all the time. People are talking about vision boards and things like that. But back then, this was like space age kind of stuff.

And so, I put his picture up on my wall just like little kids do. You know, you put your hero up. So I put him up, but I put a picture of myself, and I made sure that they were touching. So it looked like Pablo was cheering for me. And so I would see that every day and I’d be having this imaginary conversation where on good days he was saying, “Good job!” And on that, you know, challenging days, he was saying, “Come on. You can do this. Keep going.” And I was trying to make the Olympics normal at the same time.

So that’s what I try and encourage people to do now. It’s what do you want to do in the future? And let’s take it off the shelf. Let’s bring it down and let’s put it on the same level as you.

Eventually, I became a state champion of Oregon, and then I reached out to all the top 20 universities. And I tell those parts of the story just because I coach on your thoughts become your words, become your actions, right? So every step, right from the very beginning when I went up to the first coach, even though he laughed, I was clear up here and I was speaking my truth.

And if he said no, there’s no way, then I would’ve gone to the next person and spoke the same truth until it resonated with someone. But luckily, it resonated with him and, you know, started the journey with him.

And that’s what I did at the college level. When I went to the college coaches, I spoke the truth, my truth. And I said, “This is what I’ve done in four years. And just imagine what we could do together,” you know, and kinda baking them into the solution.

[00:07:11] Tina: I gotta jump in here because I’m just feeling like there’s so many stories in this. And so, first of all, you were only 14. And I know that when you and I chatted as we were getting acquainted before, you said that you did a spreadsheet. You actually did like a spreadsheet of this process of elimination of, “Well, let’s see what works in a small town in Oregon.”

By the way, I used to live in Oregon, so we have that in common as well.

And you just by process of elimination came to, “Whoop, swimming! Because this is where I live and this is what’s available. There is a swimming pool here.” You know, this type of thing. And so that’s the first thing.

And it makes me think about if we can kind of capture some of that. I mean, 14 is still a child, right? And capture some of that childlike belief. I think you were very advanced in even thinking this way. But the fact is, if we go back, if we peel back the layers, I think a lot of us can remember things that happened when we were kids that we had a knowing, we had an awareness, that almost like we came into life with that kind of gets squashed out of us.

And I think that you are fortunate that you had a parent that was into kinda the personal development stuff. So you were kind of having that cultivation at home already. But a lot of us didn’t have that at all. And somehow contract back to some little thread. That little flame. That little spark, right?

[00:08:23] Seth: Mm-hmm.

[00:08:24] Tina: That keeps carrying us forward. And then the next thing is, here you are with a bunch of eight-year-olds, and I bet you were like twice as tall, at least.

[00:08:32] Seth: At least.

[00:08:33] Tina: Yeah. And just really having that belief in yourself and that belief in what you were choosing to achieve that was so strong, you did not let anything stop you even though it was like a lot of 14-year-olds would say, “There is no way!” You know, “There was no way I’m going to the pool with these little kids.” Right?

So, I just love that, that the coach asked if you knew how to swim and you did not, but I’m going to the Olympics and four years later-

[00:08:56] Seth: Yeah.

[00:08:56] Tina: You’re already starting to win races and championships when you’re 18, right?

[00:09:00] Seth: Yeah. I mean, you know, what looks like a disadvantage, ironically now with what I do is a very, very important base foundation that I come from, which is I was in a constant state of failure, right? I didn’t see it as failure cuz it was that, right? You know, this is just the reality and I’m just learning and I’m growing and developing.

And when I start with people now, a lot of times it’s, they have a fear of failure. And if you have a fear of failure, then your performance is gonna go way, way, way down. Because everything you do, you have to win. And life doesn’t work like that, you know, it’s a process. It’s just a process.

And so that’s what I try to encourage people and be able to say, okay, failure is something we have to lean into rather than avoid. So all those things that are uncomfortable, that’s the stuff that I started with.

And so a lot of times when I’ll start with someone, I’ll say, “Okay, we gotta flush all the past, you know, we gotta let it go.”

Because we gotta start over because all those trophies that you won as a kid, you’re carrying them around on your shoulders, right? And you feel like you gotta win every single time. And if you feel like you have to win, you’re not gonna approach every opportunity with open arms and go into it and learn and grow, and you’re just gonna be playing it safe. And when you play safe, you’re really gonna be, you know, ironically, you’re gonna be failing a lot more often.

[00:10:23] Tina: You know the other thing that really comes to mind for me is your identity. Do you feel like you were already seeing yourself as a professional athlete as that Olympian? Do you feel like you were starting to embrace that as your identity even from the time you were 14 years old?

[00:10:37] Seth: Yeah, a hundred percent. I have so many stories, but one person that came to me, it was off of Instagram and I didn’t know who he was. His name was not his, you know, username. And so he said, you know, “Is this real what you do?” And I said, “Yes.”

[00:10:54] Tina: No, it was just make-believe.

[00:10:57] Seth: And so I said yes and let’s just get on a call. So we were on a 45-minute call and it turns out that he is a basketball player and it’s on a Monday, and I could tell that there was all this sort of self-sabotage, right?

When people ask me, you know, especially in interviews, “What do you do?” A lot of what I do is just help people get out of their own way. Okay?

[00:11:17] Tina: Yeah.

[00:11:18] Seth: So here he is, he’s a basketball player. He grew up in a really tough environment going bouncing from household to household. And so I felt like he wasn’t allowing, you know, and this was my Oprah moment, if you will, where I was like, he wasn’t allowing himself to succeed because that would be love. And if he didn’t feel lovable, then it would be foreign to him. I felt like he was just self-fulfilling prophecy over and over and over. “See, I’m not worthy because this happened. See, I’m not worthy. I’m not worthy.”

[00:11:49] Tina: Proving to yourself your limitations. “See, I knew all along. I couldn’t do it. See, I was right.” Right?

[00:11:54] Seth: Yeah, exactly. So all I wanted to do in that short period of time was give him a tool that would get him around that so that we wouldn’t go into old patterns. And then let’s see what happens. Right?

[00:12:06] Tina: Yeah.

[00:12:06] Seth: And I gave him this permission to just be something else, you know, like an actor becomes a part, right.

So I took him through this process of doing that, and so he’s like, you know, “Great! This is great. I have this practice. It’s really important on Thursday.” So he goes to the practice on Thursday. I go about my day, my week, and then I get this, all these messages kind of flooding in.

[00:12:30] Tina: You’re having exclamation points here and there. “Seth!!!”

[00:12:34] Seth: Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he says, “I made it. I made it.” And I was like, I just, what is he talking about? I made it. Well, it turned out that it was a tryout for the top NBA team.

[00:12:46] Tina: Oh, wow.

[00:12:46] Seth: Okay? And it was a moment where it was just like, okay, I’m definitely doing what I should be doing. And, you know, just shifted this person and helped them to shift themselves so that they could allow, you know, just who they were. It wasn’t like he was someone else. He was just allowing all that performance to come through him finally, rather getting in the way.

[00:13:08] Tina: So many things with that! So many things about his view of himself because of the stories. One of the things I talk about for Renegade Boomers, in particular people past 50 that are trying to make these shifts in their life, is that many times the people I work with, they’re very high level, but they’re so connected to the previous identity.

And in this case for this young man, it was his home life, his lack of home life, you know, the irregularity of it and not being able to trust and not feeling that he was worthy or loved because that’s what he kept experiencing from the outside world. That was the message he kept getting. And so he had internalized that as his truth, right? As this is my identity.

But when you, in four days shifted that, helped him shift from seeing yourself this way. What if you try seeing yourself this way instead? And you gave him a tool, you gave him a pathway, you gave him a portal of how to do that, things changed very quickly.

And this is such an amazing thing about how our brains work, in my opinion, because those neural pathways, I call them the old stories, the habits of thought, the way you’ve always thought it, you can start changing very quickly and your brain literally adapts, it’s moldable, there’s plasticity, right?

And it literally start creating new highways, new neural pathways of this is how I’m going to think this now. I’m choosing to think it this way. And you literally can make a decision about how you’re going to think and literally start changing your life by thinking differently.

And so this also gets into the whole kinda woo area of manifesting, right?

[00:14:37] Seth: Mm-hmm.

[00:14:37] Tina: But in manifesting, and I’m pretty sure we’re on the same page with this, it’s not let’s kick back in the lazyboy, turn on the Netflix, and start scarfing down Pringles. And oh, once in a while, I’ll think a big thought and some amazing thing’s gonna happen. It’s followed with action. I mean, it’s actually connected to making decisions about what you’re gonna do.

[00:14:54] Seth: Yeah.

[00:14:54] Tina: So, for that young man, same with interestingly enough to me, that more mature people, older people, people of certain vintage, right, that I’ve seen so many professionals that have adapted or adopted a certain story of who they are and really it’s not who they truly choose to be or feel called to be, but they’re kind of stuck of feeling like this is what the world has been telling them they needed to do in their life or in their profession.

And so one of the things on my mission is helping people through that process to really get connected to who are you? You know. Did you ever, and maybe you didn’t because your parents were probably a little more progressive about this, but I was one of those that grew up with the lecture series from the father, you know, that was cruel.

[00:15:38] Seth: Mm-hmm.

[00:15:38] Tina: That kind of question of, “Well, who do you think you are?” You know, who do you think you are?

[00:15:42] Seth: Mm-hmm.

[00:15:42] Tina: But isn’t it interesting, Seth? What’s your interpretation if we were to change that to who do you think you are-

[00:15:48] Seth: Yeah.

[00:15:49] Tina: -in a loving way of who do you truly think and believe you are? What do you think about that as far as how that young man changed his thinking in four days?

[00:15:58] Seth: You know, I’ve seen it over and over. I mean, for me, that’s the fascinating place that I just come from is this sort of imaginary, delusional, you know, I call it constructive delusion, right? That it just works to your advantage.

And so for him, a lot of it was, “Okay, now we made this shift in what I wanted to make,” cuz there’s a reality that comes after that shift. Like, “Okay, I did this, but now I need to live this.” Right?

And so that quick shift, I made sure, “Okay, now that really did happen. Okay? This wasn’t an imaginary dream thing. This was something that actually you did.” And I said, “But guess what? You can’t think that the NBA is a big deal. If you think it’s a big deal, you’re only gonna be there for a week.” Right?

And so we started this mantra because again, your thoughts become words, become your actions. So this mantra just naturally came out of me at the time and I said, “It’s no big deal because you’re the real deal.” And I said, “That’s what we’re gonna say over and over and over, just so you can own this space.”

And that’s what’s really important is, you know, you’re just helping people to see their potential or allow them. I mean, a lot of times when I start with someone, there’s just a lot of protective layers over their dreams and you’re trying to unearth it and say, you know, for him the question was, “If you couldn’t lose, what would that look like?” Right?

And I said, “Okay, well why can’t we just go out as if you couldn’t lose because we’re not afraid of failure? When we’re not afraid of failure, it changes everything because we’re gonna be about learning.” And once he did that, that changed his relationship to this uncomfortable feeling.

And a lot of times when I’m working with people, it’s pressure. How do we handle pressure? Because pressure is something that makes us, and you know, naturally our survival instincts are to avoid it. But that’s where the opportunity is.

And so I’m always trying to bring people into, I guess I could just say it bluntly, I’m bringing them into this sort of painful experience, which is failure and pressure. But you’re going to-

[00:18:08] Tina: Oh boy, sign me up, you know.

[00:18:11] Seth: But I made the point that if you go back through your life, you know, there’s Joseph Campbell, the Hero’s Journey, and he talks about, you know, follow your bliss, right? And so what is your bliss? And if you go and you look at, when was I at my happiest, when, you know, when I sat down and I painted when I, you know, wrote, or I did something, you know, expressive, or I went out there and just, you know, in life more or less captured the flag, I went for it. What was that?

And so once people start to understand their bliss, then I come in and I’ll say, “Okay, well the flow state, the zone being in the moment, that’s your optimal performance level. Okay? That’s where you experience that bliss. But here’s the catch. In order to experience the bliss, you have to get uncomfortable. Can you tell me one time in your life when you know you didn’t feel pressure or there was no, you know, the opportunity and the pressure come together,” right? They’re in the same package.

And so you’re trying to get people to move into that space that’s uncomfortable and be able to find their bliss with this acceptance that, okay, we’re gonna, I call it surfing the wave. We’re gonna surf this wave and we’re gonna get into the flow. It’s gonna be uncomfortable, but that’s where you’re happiest, you know, your joy.

[00:19:35] Tina: It is counterintuitive. Definitely counterintuitive. And I think I’m struck by how many people are afraid. You know, people know me also as a freelance copywriter that’s worked at very highest levels with some very well-known folks online and offline. And when I’m teaching people, cause I have courses about copywriting as well, but when I’m teaching them, I’m always struck by how many times people say “I am afraid. I’m scared.”

And it’s kind of like, “Of what?” And I was talking to my husband today about when I first started as a freelance copywriter, I came at it with kinda like you. I didn’t know how to write. You know, you didn’t know how to swim.

And I decided I was gonna be a freelance copywriter and I’d never written for anybody. I’d never been paid to write anything for anybody. I had not been to college, on my own since 17. Right? And I was already past 50, so, you know, and you were 14 with a bunch of eight-year-olds, right? So, you know, late bloomer-

[00:20:26] Seth: Yes.

[00:20:26] Tina: -of certain things, right? And I don’t really recall being afraid. I made a decision. It kinda lit me up, you know, like the bliss aspect of, “I love words and I love dealing with people and all that. So I’m going to do this.” Because I didn’t even, I’d never even heard of it until I was past 50. So kinda like you, that process of elimination, it was like, it just sort of came across my radar in an article and I decided, I DECIDED that that’s what I was going to become.

So what do you think about that aspect of– There’s so many things here I wanna unpack in the time we have, but like your basketball player, I’m thinking part of his old story, that belief he had that was limiting him also came from protecting himself, right?

[00:21:06] Seth: Yep.

[00:21:07] Tina: That he had to protect, he had to have a layer of protection from the way he grew up. So sometimes those old stories are insulation. We’re all wrapped up in a thick quilt of self-protection, right? So do you think that that kind of opening that up, peeling back those layers is part of the pain aspect of what you’re talking about?

[00:21:25] Seth: Yes. And you know, what’s interesting about it is, you know, we watch movies because movies are stories that we can relate to and they inspire us, right? So they’re archetypes. They’re just general figures that we can relate to. And I always go back to the movie Rudy, right? And you know-

[00:21:44] Tina: Yep.

[00:21:45] Seth: It’s about going to Notre Dame, gonna play football even though this is a small person, with bad grades. And it’s him against the odds and he just keeps focused on, you know, the end goal.

But the character that I always talk about is the father, mainly the older brother. So the people that are closest to us can be the greatest cynics, right? Spitting just poison, right?

[00:22:08] Tina: Yes.

[00:22:10] Seth: What I try to get people to understand is that it’s not about you, right? What they’re really doing is they’re trying to protect their limiting beliefs, right? And you are a threat to that existence.

And so I call them crabs in the bucket, right? So you put a bunch of crabs in a bucket, you don’t need to put a lid over the top because when one crab starts to almost get out, the rest of them pull him back, right?

And so I said, you know, let’s go back to the basketball player. I said, “Now that you made it, don’t be surprised if those people that were really cynical in your life come back around and they have amnesia. And now they want a ticket on your, you know your bandwagon.” Right?

[00:22:54] Tina: “Can I sit in a front row at your next game?”

[00:22:57] Seth: Yeah. Yeah, exactly! Because it happened to me. And then he comes back to me and he says, “How did you know that?” Like, “All of a sudden they, they’re just like, ‘Oh, I knew you could do it. I knew you could do it.'” And he’s like, “I’m getting invites to like people’s baby showers, like, these people were my biggest haters and now they want me at their most intimate parties.”

I said, “See, it wasn’t about you. They were threatened by what you represented.” And that’s what a lot of times when we go through our life, we’re surrounded by our parents, our siblings, these close, close people in our family, and we take on those limiting beliefs and you know, we don’t even know it. We don’t even realize it.

And so that’s what I try to help people to understand and not take that personally and move on and be able to move through your space and allow yourself to dream.

Because a lot of times when I start, I’ll start with building a foundation of, okay, you know, if you couldn’t lose, what does that look like?

Let’s talk about your dreams. So really what you’re doing is you’re going back to, you know, being a kid again where you did cut out pictures and put them on your wall as a kid because that was your hero, you know? And that hero is the guiding light. And so we’re gonna go do that. We’re gonna be a kid again, and we’re gonna allow ourselves to dream.

And then we’re gonna build it. And so we’re not just gonna sit there and say, “Okay, well now I’ve cut out the picture and it’s up on the wall.” No, we’re gonna go through some discomfort. Right? Because even if I gave you that result right now, it would be hollow.

Let’s say it’s $10 million, right? Or a big, huge trophy that everyone wants.

[00:24:36] Tina: Mm-hmm.

[00:24:36] Seth: If I just give you the money, if I just give you the trophy and you don’t get the journey, you’re gonna feel so empty and you’re gonna need another trophy and another trophy. Right? You’re gonna need more and more millions of dollars or whatever that, that end result is.

It’s a great guiding light, you know, and it inspires us. But ultimately, and I’ve helped people to win a lot. A lot.

[00:24:59] Tina: Yeah.

[00:24:59] Seth: And my first question is always, “Now what does it feel like? You know, you did it. You did it first time in your professional career. You did it. Now what?” They’ll say, “I wanna go do it again.”

“So, yeah, it’s not fulfilling. It was a great guiding light. It created this timeline for us to work on these important life skills. And along the way, that journey, that was a reward, wasn’t it?” “Yes.”

[00:25:28] Tina: So that’s-

[00:25:28] Seth: “And what was that journey?”

[00:25:30] Tina: That’s what it brings to mind when you were saying that the NBA’s not a big deal, you know, when you’re coaching him.

So the question I have for you about that is how you find that balance between releasing the outcome, but yet having the drive and the goal to achieve the outcome. Like, you know, you wanted to go to the Olympics or you wanted be the champion.

He wanted- And you didn’t even know he was having a tryout on that Thursday. So if the NBA’s not a big deal, then how do you balance that?

[00:25:57] Seth: Yeah, great question. I think it’s a combination. So we work on goals that are short-term, mid-term, and long-term. We give ourselves permission to dream, but we also wanna make sure that those goals, we try and find a sweet spot. If it’s too far and it’s fanciful, you’re not gonna take it serious.

And so, especially in the short-term goals, we gotta get to some things that, yes, there are stretch. They have to be out of your comfort zone and you have to reach, I like to say you need tension to grab your attention. So I’m always looking for people shifting around in their chair, cuz then I know we’re getting to the sweet spot. Now we’re like, this isn’t just dreamland, you know, this is-

[00:26:38] Tina: They are getting kinda worked up, you know.

[00:26:39] Seth: Yeah. Now I can, you know, I could see kind of getting. And then also we wanna make sure the goals aren’t too low where it’s just a to-do list, right? And, you know, again, we’re playing it safe. That’s not gonna bring us the results that we want. So you’re mapping things out.

And then at the same time, I really go back to, okay, so now you’ve achieved that goal. You have that money, you have that trophy or whatever that is, what comes with that? What’s the feeling that you get from achieving that? And around nine times out of 10, it’ll be some version of, “I’ll feel confident.” Okay?

Okay. So let’s just go with the emotion of confidence. What if you just felt confident now? Okay. Well that would increase your odds of getting to that end goal. Yes. Okay. So we’re gonna work on confidence.

What’s interesting about confidence is that confidence is a byproduct, right? If we just focus on confidence, I gotta be confident, I gotta be, you’re gonna be like a dog chasing your tail, right?

So we go back to how is confidence built? So we’re looking at little, tiny things. The irony is always like, it’s a big, huge, shiny result, but it comes back to the immediate little tiny thing that’s right in front of you, right? “What am I gonna do today? When am I gonna do this moment?” Okay?

So we’re gonna focus on little tiny things that you can actually control, which are your breathing, right? Which are, you know, even your posture. Just really super simple things. How you talk to yourself. Because you’re your greatest expert. So these are really simple things. I always like to say the power is hidden in the obvious. It’s just like you go to a nutritionist and what are they gonna most likely say?

[00:28:26] Tina: Eat more vegetables.

[00:28:26] Seth: You got to hydrate. You got to drink some water. Right? The free stuff, you know, is the most powerful thing that we gotta start with. So I’m kind of doing that with the mind.

And so I’m taking people through just understanding how do we, you know, if you think of the momentum that you’re gonna get from doing these little things, then you’re gonna build up momentum like a train. And that train just gets going faster and faster and faster. And just like real trains, even if there’s a semi on the track, those trains can go right through them. In the track is the projection out to the goal. And so you’re building the small and you’re building the big and you’re connecting the dots. So you do need the dreams.

[00:29:08] Tina: Mm-hmm.

[00:29:08] Seth: And you also need the media like, what are we gonna do now? And they get closer. And what’s interesting is they get into the process of learning and they really feel the journey, the reward. You hear people focus on the process. So that’s the process and they get so into it, and then they don’t even realize that they just achieved their goal.

And I’m the one that comes back cuz my relationship with them is A to B. You just tell me what you wanna do and that’s it. You don’t have to qualify anything with me.

Now, I have a story that I shared with you where I work with a university professor. And so when we started, she’s older and she said, “I want to retire soon.” She’s a chemistry professor, and she said, “I know that I can teach little children college level chemistry, and that’s what I want to do.”

“Okay, great. Well, what’s the goal? Like what’s the gold medal for you?”

And she said, “I want the Emmy.”

I was like, “Oh, that’s interesting. Okay, well that’s perfect.” Because that’s a shiny object that we can visually put on our phone and really start to program the subconscious mind. And so from that point we started building it out and working through things. And she started with a comic book. She hired one of the illustrators that created the Lilo and Stitch characters from Disney.

[00:30:34] Tina: Yeah.

[00:30:34] Seth: So she’s starting at the top level with putting together her team. And from there, I taught her, you know, again, it’s your thoughts become your words, become your actions. So I showed her how to do that in social media, some networking tools.

Because it’s the same thing. Social media is not some big scary thing. It goes back to are you willing to talk to people, right? Are you really willing to put your truth out there?

[00:31:02] Tina: Mm-hmm.

[00:31:03] Seth: And so just like me reaching, you know, going to the coach when I was 14 or reaching out to the college coaches. Social media is the same thing to me. It’s the same sort of version of like, you know, speak your mission statement out to the world, right?

[00:31:18] Tina: Yeah.

[00:31:19] Seth: And speak from their needs. And so we did the networking, we went through all this, you know, some networking. She built a presence online, and she built such a strong presence that the Academy of Television and Arts, they came to her and they said, “Would you like to be a judge for the Emmys?”

[00:31:40] Tina: So crazy.

[00:31:41] Seth: And last week, she was on the red carpet at the Emmys being around all these people. And so here she is. That’s her putting, you know, something up on her wall. And I always say focus on the why, not the how. The how is something that you only get one step. You gotta just focus on the why, which is that end dream.

[00:32:02] Tina: Mm-hmm.

[00:32:03] Seth: And then we’re gonna just act on the how. Those are the little tiny steps that build the momentum and just keep showing up. And so it was interesting because I didn’t even say- I’ll say, I don’t know how this is gonna end, you know. I don’t know where the story’s gonna go. We’re just gonna get closer.

[00:32:19] Tina: Yeah. I love it!

[00:32:21] Seth: And so when she came to me and said, “Yeah, the Emmys, I’m gonna judge the Emmys and now I’m going to the Emmys.” And then she was the one that’s like, “Hey Seth, you know, I just reviewed all these projects. and they’re not as good as mine.”

[00:32:35] Tina: Wow.

[00:32:36] Seth: “I’m just as good as their, at least as good as theirs.” And immediately, I was like right here, the shift’s happening just like that NBA player.

[00:32:45] Tina: Yeah.

[00:32:45] Seth: “Oh, I can play at this level.” “Oh!” And then she’s the one that- I use the same mantra with her and she says, “It’s no big deal, cuz I’m the real deal.” And she’s building that future.

And all we did was just to keep it really simple. We were like little kids. What do you really want to do? You know, go to go get a picture of that. Allow yourself to dream, and then let’s build it out.

[00:33:08] Tina: Well, the other thing I love about that story is someone that said, “I want to retire from this thing,” which is exactly what we do with the Renegade Boomer. It’s really about, you know, someone accomplished, someone that had already top of her game in another arena that sees this other pathway that’s actually more playful, maybe allowing her really true nature to come out even more fully because she doesn’t have to worry about tenure and, you know, pleasing the administration of a university or anything like that. And look, what’s happening is that literally the red carpet is rolling out before her.

And that’s what I see for so many now because our life expectancy is longer. You know, the old social security system was built that our life expectancy was early sixties. Now, many people are reaching 100, you know.

But at least having 20, 30 more years of productivity, what are you gonna do? I mean, if you wanna sit with your toes in the sand and enjoy the frosty drink, that’s awesome. But what if you could blend it along with this other deeper desire or dream that you have and play with it, right?

[00:34:07] Seth: Yeah.

[00:34:07] Tina: Whether you wanna make money with it, whether you want to do social good, it doesn’t really matter. Maybe you’ve already made your millions of dollars or you’re very secure financially, but you know that you’re not just about to go sit in a corner somewhere, right? In this case, so many things like ageism and other people’s expectations, which brings me back to what you were saying about those near and dear to you. That whole balancing act.

Because sometimes some of us have had to literally close the door on some of those folks because of toxicity, because of the story that was always told to us about ourselves or way we were seen in that particular community, or it can just be the feeling of that they feel threatened. I think the other aspect of that is, “Well, if you change, what does that mean for me?” Right?

[00:34:48] Seth: Yep.

[00:34:48] Tina:If you’re changing like this, I’m threatened by it,” you know? And so sometimes that’s also stumbling blocks for people to go through these transitions. Have you found that to be true, that sometimes people have fear and discomfort and pain around that aspect because they think they will lose other key relationships or other connections by moving forward or they’re moving beyond what some of their near and dearest are doing?

[00:35:12] Seth: Yeah. It’s a great question. And, you know, I’m a person that’s very practical. And so, I will say to them, you know, greatness can be a lonely road, you know? Because you’re doing something that not a lot of people can relate to.

And so the professor is experiencing that. The people in the academic world don’t understand, you know? And she experienced some of that pushback. Like, “Who do you think you are?” You know, that’s what she did. She shared with me. She goes, “Oh, I just got the invite from the Emmys, to judge the Emmys, and I shared it with some of my colleagues, and they think it’s a scam.” They couldn’t even get their mind around that that’s actually even possible.

[00:35:58] Tina: It’s not even on the radar, right? It’s like that can’t possibly be real. “You, who do you think you are?” Right?

[00:36:05] Seth: Yeah. So, can you imagine if she was trusting the academic world and just thinking, “Okay, well they must know. I’m just gonna discard this. It’s just a scam,” right?

[00:36:15] Tina: Yeah.

[00:36:16] Seth: She would’ve missed out on going to judging the Emmys, seeing her, you know, as an Emmy winner. As she was leaving, cool little story she shared with me, you know, I meet with her. I met with her last week and she shared the story. She said, “As I was leaving, there was a woman that had won the Emmy and she was putting it into her bag. Right? And I was seeing all these real things like, oh, that’s what you do with an Emmy. You get it and you have to take it.” Right?

[00:36:46] Tina: And you just put it in the bag. Yeah.

[00:36:49] Seth: And so she said she talked to the woman and she said, “Oh, congratulations. I loved your speech. And it was so wonderful.” And she said, “I’m working on my Emmy,” you know, and the woman was putting her Emmy in her bag and she turned to her and she says, “You’ll do it.” I was like, that’s it.

[00:37:05] Tina: Yeah.

[00:37:05] Seth: Like I get emotional about that stuff because it’s happening. It’s a real thing that’s happening and it’s just, again, it’s no big deal because you’re the real deal. Like that’s a woman that just won the ultimate prize and she’s saying you can do it.

[00:37:22] Tina: Yep.

[00:37:22] Seth: Just go do it.

[00:37:23] Tina: And it’s going to look like- It looks just like this. You know that image. I just love it, and I understand that emotional feeling that you can get because when we work with people at this level and we see that transcendence, that transformation become a reality for them, that’s because we work from the heart ourselves, right?

That that connection that we truly, truly are celebrating with them and feeling that joy and I call it my chillometer, I’m getting it right now. Like chills all over just thinking about it, you know, there it goes.

[00:37:52] Seth: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It’s, it’s incredible. I mean to me, cuz my answers have to come from inside, right? So I think what I bring to the table is that I’ve been out to what I call the performance battlefield, right? And so, yeah, I did get my degree in psychology. But for me, the real life experience of actually being out there with feeling like your life’s at risk, you know, cuz that’s the intensity of putting that much into. I mean, I was training four years in between Olympic trials for a race that was 20 seconds long.

[00:38:30] Tina: Wow.

[00:38:30] Seth: I was putting it all in the line for 20 seconds long. And so that level of commitment, that level of sacrifice in, you know, that level of pressure, right? Being able to speak from that truth, that’s what I go to. I put myself in their position and then I’ll go, “Okay, this is what I feel right now.”

And so we’re creating something organic between the two of us in the moment. And I’m always, I’m a participant, but I’m also in the flow state, so I’m also an observer of what’s going on at the same time. And I’m interested in what’s gonna happen because I’m saying maybe the same sort of overall content to them that I said to others, but it’s coming out completely unique with them. And I’m like, “Oh, that’s interesting.” And I’m allowing that to be something that they’re drawing it out of the experience.

And also for me, if we go back to the flow state from being in the zone, being in the flow and that discomfort, right? Like that’s when you’re at your best is when you’re surfing a big wave.

Those big wave surfers, they get into the flow state just about every time. And so those are the people that I look to for inspiration. And so the three main elements of that is, you know, I call it the tripod, is you have to have a sense of control. So you have to be able to surf the wave. You’re not just gonna get in over your head because then you’re gonna be overwhelmed. So you do need some sort of ability. Can you handle the task that’s asked?

And then the other leg is unpredictable. So every wave is brand new in their world, so it has to be unpredictable.

And then the third leg, which is where we spend a lot of time on, is pressure. So there’s a pressure because if they crash, they could literally die. And so we’re gonna feel the same sensations by caring about our goals. That’s what’s gonna create that pressure. You know, you gotta drop into a big wave and it’s all relative.

So everyone has a big wave in them, you know? But you gotta drop in. And when you’re dropping in, I don’t care who you are, it’s gonna be uncomfortable. And once you connect the dots with people, like that’s where you experience your bliss, right?

So you know, I was helping with someone that, you know, works with a big corporation and they were shifting the corporations around, like the offices around and they gave him some warning and they said, “You can go and talk to everyone, you know, if you want to.” And this is the big- I’ll just say the name, the big IBM, right?

[00:41:09] Tina: Yeah.

[00:41:10] Seth: And so I took him through the networking, and you know, he wants to reinvent himself, so he’s nervous about that. But that’s a good thing. And he’s older as well and he looked at it and he said, “Okay, so you’re saying I gotta get into the flow?”

“Yes, you gotta surf that wave.” And so for him, it was reaching out to a different department, you know, something that he had been curious about. And so he said, “My heart was beating out of my chest when I was about to send that message just to make that introduction.”

[00:41:41] Tina: Yeah.

[00:41:42] Seth: And so I said, “But that’s the wave. That’s the wave. We’re getting in the wave.”

And so he said, ” It was like almost magical because within one week, I had four meetings. Things I never would’ve done in the past. I had four meetings and these meetings were high level. They were so much higher than I’d experienced before. And there was one that said, ‘Well, I don’t think you’re qualified because this is really specific and we take, and we train these people for, you know, he said, but I’d be willing to talk to you.'”

So he goes into this high level, you know, conversation and the guy goes, “Well, you know, it’s not gonna work in my division, but I really like you, so I want to help you. So I’ll introduce you to some other people.” And he was like, “Wow!”

And I was like, you know, that’s the flow. That’s being in the zone. That’s your bliss and you gotta just keep surfing those waves.

And so, that’s part of what I’m doing. That’s what’s genuine about me, is that I’m surfing with them. Right? I’m never comfortable. I mean, that’s just my process, is that I’m never comfortable, you know.

[00:42:46] Tina: And then in term- And then understanding that that’s okay, you know? So, I think you just said kind of a game plan because I’m particularly interested, I know you’ve worked with so many professional athletes, but I’ve heard you interview, our conversation, there’s several examples of working with people in business and so for entrepreneurs, for those that are moving into a new realm or that are over 50 because you and I both inhabit that land as well.

[00:43:09] Seth: Mm-hmm.

[00:43:09] Tina: That’s never comfortable either, you know, not completely, right? And so can you kind of sum up, as we’re wrapping this up today, maybe three tips that you would give, and I think you kind of just did, but kind of revisit that for those that are entrepreneurial, those that are venturing into something new or going to shift from what they used to do, what that looks like.

Like your college professor who literally got pushback from other kind of like- And it’s almost like kind of some jealousy it sounds like too, you know of, “What does she think? She’s- What? What do you mean going to Hollywood?” You know, this kind of stuff.

[00:43:41] Seth: Yeah.

[00:43:41] Tina: Can you kinda give us like three tips for entrepreneurs that are making that shift or coming into a new aspect of what they’re doing, how they ride that wave?

[00:43:50] Seth: Yeah, okay. So I would say, I’d probably do a 1, 2, 3 and say, okay, first of all, just start to let yourself, you know, dream, right? I know it’s gonna be uncomfortable, but it’s uncomfortable for everyone. Especially if you’ve been disappointed in the past, you’re probably playing it safe. You’re probably protecting yourself.

Your goals are probably more stretch yourself, put yourself out there, in that uncomfortable space, just give yourself permission. If I couldn’t lose, what would that look like? Right?

[00:44:21] Tina: Yep.

[00:44:21] Seth: And then do maybe, you know, that’s a long term, do a midterm and a short term. Focus on those little things that you can do that you have control over now, right away. And then I would say, okay, so that’s number one.

And then number two is gonna be that, go into it knowing that you’re gonna fail and lean into the failure, okay? There’s a phrase that I learned from someone that’s a dear friend of mine that that’s one of the NBA mental coaches. And he helped someone to just basically turn their career around. And it was their relationship to failure, which is, “fail your way to the top,” right?

And so Kobe Bryant is someone that I use kind of as an archetype because he was always in the process of learning and his quote was, “Failure is an illusion,” right? And he’d say it is.

What’s failure? Your failure is not failure to me. So it’s not a fact. It’s what you’re interpreting. And so my failure’s different. And I get to define it whatever way I want. And it’s an illusion cuz it’s all made up. Just tell me what it is. Can you tell me what failure is? It doesn’t exist because the only failure that I would say is failure is if you fail on Monday and you don’t get up on Tuesday, that’s failure. Right? But if you get up again on Tuesday, you’re learning.

[00:45:46] Tina: Mm-hmm.

[00:45:46] Seth: So it’s a process of learning.

[00:45:48] Tina: Excellent. Mm-hmm.

[00:45:49] Seth: So that would be number two. And number three is just embrace the pressure and get into that wave. Find a wave that, you know, that scares you a little bit. We don’t want it to be too big where you get overwhelmed, but get into that flow and find something and just know that it’s gonna be uncomfortable. Just know that it’s gonna be uncomfortable. But that’s something where you’re gonna find your bliss. And if you go back through your life and you say, “When I was a little, just a little bit daring, man, I felt so alive,” right?

[00:46:18] Tina: Yeah. And that’s excellent because it’s kinda like, do I see the discomfort and then the bliss is like, okay, so you pushed through that. Like your guy with the big company and having that uncomfortable phone call where his heart was beating out of his chest or hitting the send button for his email, whatever that might have been. But then the bliss was, “Oh my gosh, look what happened next. I got this conversation and this person’s gonna help me by introducing me to others, like the ultimate networking,” right? And so would you consider that to be kind of the discomfort that turns in- that also joins forces with the bliss?

[00:46:50] Seth: Yes. I would, you know, with the study, if you take those, that tripod and you apply it to money, okay, a lot of people say, “Well, if I make a certain amount of money, then I could pay all my bills and all my problems are gonna be-“ We know, you know, people will throw around, “Well, you know, money doesn’t make you happy.”

But in that study with that tripod, you can show that money doesn’t make you happy. So let’s say, you know, a hundred million dollars, that’s a lot of money to a lot of people, not everyone, but a lot of people. Okay?

So all of a sudden you have control over your life, okay? So I’ll give you that. That’s the first leg of the tripod. But all of a sudden, you live in this big mini mansion or a mansion, and you know, everything’s predictable, right? So you’ve lost the unpredictability, right? And then the third is you have no pressure. There’s no pressure. You don’t have to do anything, right?

So then people will go, “Well, I have a hundred million dollars, and I’m miserable,” right? “I want to give that lottery back because now I see everybody else just wants my money and all these experiences of all the–“

[00:47:53] Tina: You can’t trust anybody, you know. Everyone has ulterior motives. It’s like the basketball young man who suddenly, everybody was like, “I knew you could do it.” You know.

[00:48:02] Seth: Yep.

[00:48:02] Tina: And you don’t know what’s real anymore with those relationships, right? And so I would equate this to the anti-retirement movement that I’m forging ahead with and feel this mission for, not only cuz I’ve lived it, cause I didn’t start until I was past 50 with what I’m doing. Don’t do the math, right? But because the dream of retirement, of just sitting, doing absolutely nothing can be a formula for early death or, you know, complete boredom at the very least.

And so keeping your brain active and continuing to pursue those goals and continuing to lean into some of that discomfort and not thinking it’s ever gonna be like, “Okay, I’ve arrived to this place of complete comfort at all times,” which ends up actually being like, “Wow, am I bored out of my gourd,” right? There’s no more challenges left.

So this has been so amazing, and I feel like entrepreneurial people that are watching this wherever you are in this realm, whether you’re an athlete, whether you’re an artist, you know, Seth has ways that he can work with you as well. And I hope that these steps that we’ve gone through in some of our conversation today has kind of lit a fire under, under you. And that not only the aspirational aspect, but the motivational aspect and really the promise of what’s possible for you whether you’re in your retirement years and starting something completely new, wanna transition from what you used to do or still chasing that bigger wave, so to speak. So, Seth, how can people get ahold of you if they’d like to follow up with you and just learn more about what you do?

[00:49:24] Seth: Well, the simplest is, you know, my full name, sethpepper.com, you know, that’s my website. I try to put all the interviews on there. So you can go and listen to some of the podcasts and you can contact me if you’re interested in the coaching and working with one-on-one and then also with groups, with companies and with teams. And then social media across the board, Seth Pepper.

[00:49:47] Tina: Seth Pepper, ought to find you. I mean, it’s a cool name, so- the spice of life and all of that, you know, we could have a whole field day with that. But thanks so much for being here with me today and you know, I love that we can meet outside of getting our hairstyle by the fabulous Michelle at the Wild Orchids in Tucson, plug, that’s for you Michelle.

[00:50:07] Seth: Yes.

[00:50:08] Tina: Thanks so much for being here today. I really loved our conversation. I look forward to having more conversations with you as well. So don’t hesitate to reach out to Seth if you’d like to work with his mental magic and get your game going even better than you ever thought you could.

So, thanks again, Seth, for being here today. Appreciate it.

[00:50:24] Seth: Thank you for your time. I really appreciate it.

[00:50:25] Tina: Yeah.

Copyright 2023 Tina Lorenz

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